Response: Steamboat Willie and the Hand Jive
Regardless of what you think of the “home situation” concerning the extended Mouse family, hopefully, we can agree that while in the throes of today’s animatronic revolution, squeaky-voiced rodents and their irksome brethren have no place on the Silver Screen. They are but a regrettable relic of yesteryear and shall forever remain so. It’s hard to imagine anyone ever watched such ridiculous nonsense as Mickey the Mouse. When those ancient Goofy or Betty Boop or Foghorn Leghorn (“Son, I say son…”) cartoons come on the goggle-box, I change the channel faster than Pepe Le Pew leaving a USO show. Not only is it hard to understand what the characters are saying, the animation is just plain worthless. It’s like a five year old with Parkinson’s drew it. The lines are all squiggly and you can see the individual frames changing. Today’s animators have it down pat. Seriously, I don’t know how they do it. Just one stellar film after another, each one surpassing its’ predecessor and upping the animation ante if you will. They can take anything, and through the magic of computers, make it appear real to an unknowing audience. Could someone tell me why the animators back in the 20s let such good technology go to waste? The tools were right in front of their damn faces. But no, they preferred to spend 60 hours a week “drawing,” from scratch mind you, a cartoon mouse that talked as if his testicles were in his throat. Well, excuse me, if I don’t mourn the loss of Oswald the Lucky Rabbit. Give me a break.
And primitive animation techniques aside, how did those God awful storylines ever see the light of day? Cat chases the mouse. Cat catches the mouse. Some horrible calamity befalls the cat. The mouse escapes and taunts the cat. Alright, I get it. I freaking get it. Cats and mice should avoid each other. Lesson noted. How often did the writers at Hanna-Barbera really have to explore the cat vs. mouse conundrum in order to put hot dogs on the dinner table?
Today’s animated shows and feature length films offer a much more enlightened take on humanity. Take the gripping story of Mulan for example. After her lame father is called to battle, a young Chinese maiden courageously takes his place by disguising herself as a man, and ultimately saves the Chinese kingdom with a little help from a hilarious dragon voiced by Eddie Murphy. Oh, Edward Murphy, how you make me laugh. Talk about genius. The man is a national treasure. His voice work is so multi-faceted; it’s as if he could voice any African-American animal. In Mulan, he provides the voice of a dim-witted but lovable dragon, yet in the Shrek series, he is a dim-witted but lovable donkey. That is what you call versatility folks. And I hope everyone else is as thrilled as me that they have already started making Shrek 4. You know that there were actually people saying that three Shreks was enough? Never. I won’t rest until the character of “Donkey” is mentioned in the same breath as Rick Blaine.
On a side note, my grandfather actually delivered newspapers to Walt Disney in North Hollywood in the late 30s. I would like to think the young paperboy inspired some sort of character in Disney’s illustrious career that never saw the light of day. Like Jackie the Jumping Jellyfish, or Jackie the Joking Jackal, or Jackie the Je… Alright, I’ll stop.
posted by A Contemporary Bunkshooter @ 9:48 AM,
